An aspiring author confronts the literary demons of the world and sets off in search of an agent.

Monday, October 18, 2010

The Tony Soprano Query

What if Tony Soprano was an aspiring author? How might he handle the challenges of finding a literary agent? Sounds like a great idea for a book! 

Tony Soprano has got himself an unpublished manuscript.

Lord knows, he’s got a great story to tell. It’s all in there: the whacks, the goomahs and, of course, the importance of family.

One day, serendipity brings him into contact with the literary agent of his dreams, Stella Portalucia. Tony starts to tell her about his book; she cuts him short. “Send me a query letter,” she says. He is crestfallen; she explains, “it ain’t personal, it’s how I do business.”

Tony doesn’t handle rejection very well, but he’ll do anything to do business with Stella. Now, the man who has carved an empire amidst the teeming turnpikes of New Jersey must do the unthinkable – he must write a query letter!

Meanwhile, Carlucci Cacciatore, a former priest turned publisher, has secretly approached Tony’s wife Carmela about publishing a tell-all book. He’s made a damn fine offer.

So much for the importance of family.


1 comment:

Kate Evangelista said...

Sounds just about right! I was laughing on the floor. Leave the gun take the cannoli style. Oh, and just got signed with an agent. :-)